Friday, April 30, 2010

...Received By the Broken-Hearted...

People will never cease to amaze me, but my naivety may be a factor. While meeting our son, she used her words to hurt not only my husband but to hurt my parents-in-law. She couldn't believe I would marry him. Thankfully, he married me. With my roots, it became increasingly surprising that his parents did not forewarn him away from me.

The holidays were fast approaching. As time grew near, something inside me was silently preparing me for what would be a Christmas I would not soon forget. Broke, she said, and wouldn't be able to get our children anything for gifts. I assured her, that was fine, they needed nothing, just to spend time with their grandmother. She wanted to pick them up something, however. Oh, and she had some things of mine to bring to me as well.

The time for visiting arrives as does she and his parents. She begins early asking me to look through the things she brought. I do, but do not tell her. There are photos of him in the items she brought. I begin telling her I will look through them after gifts, just to put her off because I do not want to deal with it. I want to enjoy our Christmas.

She apologizes for not getting the kids much. It's fine, again I assure her. She begins discussing what she bought my sister's daughters, bragging, even. Not to me, but to my daughter, the oldest, who can understand what it means to feel jealous. Thankfully, she does not care. I feel every cell in my body beginning to coil for strike. She will not hurt my children in any way, with her touch or words. She will not.

Many other hurtful things are talked about by her before the end of the evening. I hold it in, not wanting to cause a scene on Christmas in front of my children. I will discuss it with her later, privately. Maybe. Will I be able to pull those strings hard enough until they break to force her to relinquish that hold? Can I really assert myself enough to show her that she cannot hurt me anymore? Am I strong enough?

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