Healing is not immediate, and sometimes can be just as difficult as the journey of hurt that brought you to the need for healing. Months passed and the ache began to dull. Anger flared and froze, having a huge flame one moment and doused in tears the next. I began to deal with other feelings that I wasn't even aware I had until I was broken down to the rawest form of myself.
Unconditional acceptance anchored deep in my children's eyes kept me going. One look, and it reminded me of everything a mommy should be, because I could never imagine replicating her actions toward my own offspring. Never.
This time was especially hard for my husband. I won't elaborate because that is his story to tell, not mine; however, being so in-tune with each other, I knew that it was difficult on him.
Finally days went by and my thoughts became clearer, no longer clouded with so much emotion. I felt as though I had finally become free -- free from the bondage of hurt, free from obligation to please her and free to be nothing more than just me.